I want 2012 to be a milestone of change and it starts now… here… with me “getting my house in order.” So, I am intentionally honing at the first of 2012 in a way that I trust will lead to some serious cutting away of the unnecessary in favor of a sharper, more impactful use of my future. I want to disentangle myself of the “clutter”; simplify and streamline so that I will be more available for what the Lord would direct me to do with my life. Once I get through the tediousness of reorganization I believe I will not only be freed from the space-hogging “stuff” of things and superfluous obligations, but will also free up time which I KNOW can be better spent.

How am I doing it? First, I have gone to greater lengths to seek God’s will. I am still dedicating daily time to reading God’s Word. I have been blessed by the “read through the Bible in a year” discipline for the last three years. Every single time I come to portions where I say “I don’t remember ever having read THAT before”.  I can testify that the Word of God is “living” just as  the Scripture itself testifies. It has great power for change. So I am starting year four of reading through it cover to cover on top of my other in-depth studies. After all I cannot “hide God’s Word in my heart” if I don’t read or hear it.

I further sharpen the axe, so to speak, by prayer. This one has become ever more important to me. Almost exactly a year ago, a very dear elderly woman in our church passed away. At her funeral service I was profoundly struck by the number of people that spoke of her as a prayer warrior. It was especially gripping when children and grandchildren testified to finding list upon list in her handwriting of specific prayer requests, with dates of prayer concerns and dates answered or additional updates. This prayer warrior had gone before God’s throne with concerns and praises of hundreds of people. . . she had interceded in a very actionable way… naming them specifically (whether dear family member or stranger) . The hundreds of names that this woman left behind and her children found shook my prayer life to its core. “WHY? Why Ellen, don’t YOU pray more? What impact are YOU having through prayer?”

When it comes to praying for others, my method of praying over the years has been more of a series of darts thrown heavenward. I guess because I am visual, I rely heavily on cues to remind me to pray for a certain person. My kitchen faucet is assigned to those who I continue to pray for salvation. My refrigerator door handle reminds me to pray for provision. My bathroom ( medicine cabinets) remind me to pray for those suffering physical needs. Newstime on TV… lots of prayer cues there, but also reminds me to pray for our government and public servants. When I see an emergency vehicle, traffic accident, obvious suffering, I immediately shoot off another prayer dart. I don’t mean to belittle this method of praying, but one thing it does NOT do, is it doesn’t keep an account like a prayer journal would do.

So – - – I resolved in 2012 to start a prayer journal. But that left me with the big question of HOW exactly do I DO that?!  I mean, when I was a teenage girl I started a diary (complete with lock and key to keep out nosey siblings) just as many of my friends did. However, inevitably I’d vow to write in my diary every day, and by early February I’d miss a day or two. My life just wasn’t that noteworthy. I’d feel guilty for missing my entries, then sharpen my resolve and maybe get an addition week or two of entries in a stretch. Next thing you know, I’d not have another entry for months and that one would be some special event had happened like a family 4th of July gathering or something!

Well, I’ve decided to walk as a Christian . . . by FAITH.  That faith is not in myself. No way! I am going to trust in God to give me both the direction AND the strength to achieve what HE wants me to accomplish. I know that I might fail. uh..strike the word “might”. . . I  will fail. Maybe repeatedly. However, this is NOT all about me. It’s about Jesus Christ. It’s about my wanting to be more like Him; to truly intercede for people on behalf of what has not only current ramifications for the person(s) I am praying for, but everlasting consequences. I truly ache for those who struggle through life without a Savior. I feel that ache as I visualize Jesus outside of Lazarus’ tomb and the gates of Jerusalem crying. So prayer is too important of a privilege for me to take lightly. Not that I was in any way insincere in my “prayer without ceasing” method of praying “darts” throughout my day, but I need to add something more.

I believe I need to start journaling prayer. It is not going to be easy for me, but I think of the ebenezers that were set as memorial stones of remembrance throughout the Old Testament. These were lasting testimonies to what God had done! So I have consulted a few friends to ask for ANY suggestions on HOW they prayer journal. Any advise at all is welcome. I know it is not a one method fits all proposition. I am handicapped in not having a step by step instruction method before me on this one. However, I believe that I must purpose to do this for the benefit of being able to look back on those lists, all the names, all the prayers and answers to prayers, listing the many praiseworthy “only by God’s grace” occurrences that people explain as miracles, etc.  I think that perhaps this will be a wonderful tool to remind me of God’s active involvement in our lives.

In regard to prayer. . . the very beginning of 2012 has brought to me a new spiritual discipline as our church has encouraged people to engage in prayer in fasting during the first 40 days of 2012. Not that I have never, ever fasted before. But this time I planned ahead; I took time to prepare for the time of fasting and prayer. All the other times were more like emotionally entering a short time of fasting contemporaneously. This time; like my determination of being more intentional in all the areas of my life, I am taking the time to grab up the axe of action and not just start chopping, but to take the time to grind that axe to a very sharp edge by using the Lord’s honing stone to sharpen me “before” I can be used more effectively.  ”Grind on Master . . . I know there is some shiny metal under all of this rust and if anyone can get to it, You can!” In the meantime I would much appreciate your prayers as I press myself against the grinding stone that will reshape my future. Likewise, if you have ANY comments about how you handle this area of spiritual development I would be very grateful if you shared them with me.

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Should this happen in an area that is not frequented by road-kill restraunteers (like Kentucky or Arkansas) or buzzards, a few more car tire passes placed across the remains and a couple of days of drying and stiffening; then; wallah… you have yourself a frisbee squirrel.

Now that you have the proper definition, you can better appreciate why I chose to use the “frisbee squirrel” as an accurate descriptor for my body on some days. On really, excessively weak days I even say “transparent” frisbee squirrel day implying run over even more!

If this were a Bugs Bunny cartoon, maybe someone could just pick me up, shake me a little from side to side, and then blow me back up (like a balloon) into shape!

As it is, I have discovered that severe Chronic Fatigue makes my Foreign Accent Syndrome much worse (so no talking), I am too weak to do anything (so bedrest) and confusion makes reading and writing difficult. That is why you may not hear or see me much, but will see … It’s a Frisbee squirrel day @@=~

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I learned that Japan is frequently esteemed for it’s disaster readiness. I then contrasted that with the thought that although they may be prepared for an earthquake or other natural disaster are they really ready for their future?

As I spent the entire night without sleep I was fasting in prayer. I thought about how somehow appropriate it was that this was happening during the season of Lent; a time of darkness awaiting the coming light. I drew many analogies to what was happening in Japan and our attempts in my city, state, county and nation for building a Christian Emergency Network. This being a group of people who serve the community during times of distress by not only helping meet their physical needs, but also addressing their spiritual needs. Disasters come and go, but the power of the Gospel is an everlasting deliverance.

I literally had hours to focus on what God was doing in the Midnight Hours!! At this time when I would normally have been asleep for hours and not even known about what was happening on the other side of the world I was having a study in the impact of prayer.

WHY? Isn’t that often the question at such times as this?

Why am I really up now? Do I not trust that God has everything under control? Am I grotesquely “rubber necking” at the images playing out in the footage from the other side of the world? I had to really pray “search my heart oh Lord, and let me know if there is any wicked way in me. Reveal any sin in me so that I may repent and be in good standing with you and with others.” I know the importance of coming into His presence with a clean heart so that I would not be offensive to Him. I want my time of prayer and seeking God to be one of communion in a sweetness that grows my relationship with Him as I long to learn more about God and how to be transformed into a more accurate image of who He created me to be.

After I addressed these concerns I was better able to focus on reaching out over the world-wide web to people with news as it was happening live. This is a passion of mine; communication through using visual new media in order to take people I may never have met and be able to encourage and equip them. “Coming alongside” also meaning “to comfort”  the Greek word paraklesis — the very act of doing life “together” is what the church is called to do I believe. The “Helper” that Jesus said He was going to send when He went away was the Holy Spirit — the paraklete. I get so stirred up with the Holy Spirit at such times that it is like this Tsunami Wave crossing the Pacific…it’s traveling great distances at high speed (500 – 700 m.p.h.) and is anticipated to have an impact!

WHAT IS A TSUNAMI?

Being from the land-locked Midwest United States, many of the people I live around haven’t a clue what a Tsunami is. Therefore, I thought I would use this short little clip to help explain:Wave-generation-characteristics-recession-inundation

So a Tsunami is generated by a sudden shock. It is NOT a gigantic wave but is more like a surging high tide in fast motion. Out at sea where the ocean floor is so deep there may be no little elevation of a “wave” detectable. However, as the Tsunami wave reaches the shoreline and shallower ocean floor, the elevation of the wave will increase. In fact, as Tsunami is nearing the shore, a sudden very outgoing tide may signal the impending trouble soon to follow. Just as it is often “darkest before the dawn”; it is often an extremely fast outgoing low tide tsunami tide feeder right before the incoming high tsunami tide comes surging in.

We saw that principle at work after the New Orleans flooding disaster a few years back. Tremendous loss of life and property, a very dark time for many people and their communities. Then, just as God always does … the light of goodness comes shining thru. God’s light doesn’t just trickle in either, it FLOODS in to overtake the darkness. How does God do this? Through prayer.  Don’t you see? We are given the awesome honor of being able to join in a concert of prayer! Today, with our connectivity through the internet and mobile devices, more than ever we are able to reach out at any time of day or night and say “here I am,” “I am here with you,” and “let’s pray.” Isn’t that exciting?

One of my favorite songs talks refers to the story in the Bible where Jesus halted the raging storm with a word. Some of the lyrics say, ” sometimes he calms the storm, other times he calms the child.” That is to say, when we go through these “storms” of troubles, as I pray for God to “stop the storm,” but IF I am praying according to His will, I think I will pray like Jesus did in Gethsemene before He went to die to take on punishment for sins He never committed. . . “Father please let this cup pass from me, nevertheless, not MY will, but THINE be done.”

It seems so often that when I have prayed this way for others God either changes their situation to a more acceptable/comfortable one OR God causes such growth through both the person and me that I then see the “why” more clearly. When I still don’t see the “why” I firmly stand on “His ways are higher than my ways… I am His child always and forever… He loves me and will only do what is best for me.” And that goes for any of my brothers and sisters in the Lord as well.

UPDATE:

My friend in Maui reports that they had only about six foot waves and had a photo on his FaceBook page from their hotel where there were a couple of people actually out in the rough surf. That is not smart. In fact, upper California or Oregon had a person or two swept out and lost at sea for such foolish activity. Another analogy for those who will not heed a warning and believe “it’s not that bad” or “it doesn’t apply to ME”.

Santa Barbara, I waited as long as I could before writing this post, but Sue had not called me back so I found out through an online source that the beaches had been closed along the California coast as a precaution. However, they just warned people in the marina, and told swimmers and surfers to remain out of the water until the all-clear is given.

So no harm done to either of the places and people that I was praying fervently for all night long. That is, those that I already knew. However, my prayers are continuing for the people of Japan!! There have been reports of hundreds, but I suspect more like thousands of deaths. Plus I keep going back to the thought of the ripping hearts of the mothers and thier babies separated, unable to communicate. Also the myriads of people who are stuck without transportation walking towards there homes; not knowing if their homes are even there. Remember, it is also very COLD! There are some emergency shelters, but those will be full and stretched in resources. Families are certainly separated, unable to locate one another. Are they safe? God only knows !

Therefore, I will continue the tsunami wave of prayer for the relief and rescue efforts that are no doubt underway even now. I am exhausted! I have been up for nearly 2 solid nights now. However, since I have posted this, I am going to be able to get to sleep knowing that God is at work in all this.

As mighty as the power of that earthquake was, and as devastating as the resulting waves of destruction across Japan – God Himself is the ALL-Mighty who never sleeps nor slumbers. It is night now, I must sleep. I will do so with the glorious hope of the approaching light of a brighter tomorrow!

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Emergency kit

There’s a huge winter storm coming! It’s shaking people up to see just about all of the United States east of Cheyenne Wyoming with some kind of winter storm watch or warning. Weathermen are predicting freezing rain, sleet, snow, ice and then powerful winds. This storm is expected to hit central Indiana over the next two days. In fact portions of our area are receiving freezing rain RIGHT NOW.

This has prompted many people to get prepared. . . are YOU prepared?

It only takes 1/2 inch of ice buildup on the lines to bring them down, especially if there is high winds causing them to sway and tree branches to fall. Ice storms are known for causing wide-spread power outages, so it is wise to prepare. If you hear “popping” or see sparking and wires down — stay away and keep others away and call your electric company or 911 immediately. (some phone numbers at the end of this post).  If you are in your car and the line falls on it. Do NOT leave the car unless told to do so by emergency personnel.

Are you and your family ready if your power should go out during this winter storm? Have you talked with your kids and have an emergency plan in place ? If you were told that you must be out of the house “NOW” (gas leak, fire, evacuation) would you be ready?

The American Red Cross says you can prepare by putting together a disaster supply kit, to be used in your home in the event of an emergency, and a “go kit,” which is something you would take with you if you need to evacuate to a shelter.

Your disaster supply kit at home could include such things as:

• at least 3-day supply of food (ideally eaten w/o heating, granola bars, cheese and crackers, cereals, etc. — don’t forget the can opener if you have canned goods)
• possible food-heat source, (ie. gel fuel, propane for outdoor cooking only)
• water at least a gallon a day
• first aid kit,
• flashlights and batteries.
• heating sources- candles, tea lights, lanterns, (+ matches in water proof cont.)
• Warm Blankets and clothing.

I.D. and Documentation. Always being sure that everyone is carrying some kind of Identification. You can have fun and create one for your kids with an index card and their photo, name, your name and cell phone number.  Also, it is good to create a secret word to know if someone is claiming to be taking them to you.

Remember that with power out… you will not be able to CHARGE you cell phone or mobile devices. Many people have all there important phone numbers stored electronically, so it is wise to transfer important contact information, accounts etc. into a small address book or notebook that you keep in your purse or on your person.

A digital camera (with extra batteries) may be of great use if you suffer some damage from the storm. I ALWAYS carry one with a set of extra batteries for it. This is especially important for capturing and documenting news as it happens. I keep my cell phone for only communication not photos.

Our First Aid Tackle Box

A “Go-Kit” (can be grabbed if you must evacuate in a hurry or go to shelter) . Place the following type items in a rolling suitcase or backpack:

• bedding,
• clothing for all family members, Warm & weatherproof
• medications,
• personal care items,
• toys or books for the kids and snacks.
• a notebook/folder with important addresses, phone numbers, & accts. info & key family photos.

Dog Bucket to Go

Don’t forget your PET Emergency family needs: (We keep ours in a five gallon bucket always ready in case of emergency evacuation.

• food Lg. ziplocs work well
• and water for your animal (reused gal. juice container)
• leashes and collars (be sure I.D. tag is on animal)
• toys, blanket, brush or comb, ziplocs for cleanup
• extra rope is always good to have for tie up or makeshift muzzle.

If you plan on using a grill, make sure it stays outside. Don’t operate it in a garage or a basement due to carbon monoxide and fire concerns.

Get Ready:

• Fill your gas tank
• Charge cell phones
• Have extra cash
• Stock non-perishable food
• Consider back-up methods for food/water, heat and lighting
• Have ice melt and non-clumping kitty litter on hand for melting and traction.

Electrical Power Providers:

IPL power outages.  To report an outage or a downed power line, please call 317.261.8111 or 317.261.8222 or toll-free at 1.888.261.8222. or 911 if an emergency.

Duke Energy outages. If you see a fallen power line, call Duke Energy at 1-800-343-3525 and select Option 2 or contact your local emergency services immediately.

Vectren outages. Call (800) 227-1376 to report an outage or downed line.

These are just suggestions based on my understanding of what the American Red Cross and local news reporters are suggesting, along with personal experience. Using your own common sense trumps it all. The purpose of this post is simply to prompt you to ready yourselves and consider items you may not have thought of.

I very much welcome other personal suggestions that you would make. What kind of experiences have you had with emergencies that caused you to better prepare for the future? Please feel free to send a comment and I will post it if it is helpful.

Now, people … get ready!

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It was absolutely incredible to have one of these precious cubs climbing on me and playing with me. However, the best for me personally was when I fed her a bottle of warm milk. Kandy was a very good nurser and had all ten ounces down in no time. The next thing you know she was fighting to keep her eyes open as she cuddled up to a soft stuffed animal and started to take a cat nap.

This is a segment of video where the female six week bengal tiger named Kandy was playing with me while mouthing a lot. The two little cubs are teething and the animal handlers said they are encouraging them NOT to bite. She is really quite gentle, but you will see me guide her off of biting on my socks or my jeans, etc.  I asked the zoo person what I should say;  like “be gentle” or “no bite” and he said when they get bigger all of that “goes out the window” and a handler will most likely get scratched up in those encounters. That’s part of why they are doing so much handling at this young age. One of the zoo’s goal is to be able to handle the animals for regular exams without the need to use sedatives, yet, realizing that these are wild animals and a person can get hurt. Mutual respect is practiced here.

I was so very blessed to be able to have this encounter while I was visiting my parents who lived in the area of this zoo.  There were only a very few time slots left so my daughter and I went in at different times, but the way it worked out, we were better able to witness the other person having fun and take more photos that way. : )  Plus, I discovered the cubs will actually be gone for the next couple of weeks at another zoo. So it is amazing that the timing worked out.

I talked to other zoo visitors about how it must have been like this in the garden of Eden. God had originally intended for man to live with the animals and subdue the earth. It was fun to think about. Well I can now check this special experience off of my “bucket list.”

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I was enjoying a lovely time out at a local establishment to listen to one of the bands my husband plays bass in; The Usual Suspects. I really do enjoy going to hear them play, not as much as when we play/sing in the same band together, but still a lot of fun. Music is still one of my all time favorite escapes.

I think that may be why it was such a jolt to the night when the normal “where are you from” became more in depth than usual. It turns out that one of the visitor’s for another band member is a doctor from New York and he flat out couldn’t believe me. So I had to go into verification mode at a time that I would have rather been enjoying the music, singing along and joking around with the other people. Don’t get me wrong; I think that it is neat that a young doctor is skeptical, but the timing of this particular encounter was unfortunate.

Because I know how very rare this disorder is, I feel an added responsibility to communicate the information about Foreign Accent Syndrome. However, because I am not a specialist, a doctor or someone who works in the medical field, my words are often held up to greater scrutiny and skepticism by those who do have such professions.

As a result, at a time when I would be relaxing and just enjoying, I now had to go into “work” mode. It is real work to try to describe something that has happened which is so rare. I’d offer proof, he’d counter with another question, and on it went. After several minutes of this, I told him that he should go ahead and look it up on the internet, but not to be surprised when he doesn’t find much information. I am one of 39 medically documented cases in the world . . . ever.

I was relieved to see that he had an internet capable phone so he could continue his query there. Which he did.  So I was able to enjoy the last two songs of the first set.  I was further relieved when my husband joined us at the table and further questions about its authenticity were confirmed for the young doctor. I have nothing against the young man, it simply was a timing issue and the fact that it made me “go there” at a time when I just wanted down time.

It is sad to believe that I can never really escape from this new voice’s impact on my everyday life. It is sadder still that some professional people will question my integrity when faced with something that they don’t know. I think that’s really what bothered me. I am telling the truth here. How can you stand there and call me a liar?  Yes, it IS interesting? But what can we DO about it? What can we learn? How about being helpful instead of being skeptical?

Although I wrote those thoughts from a carnal viewpoint, I do see something to be learned here. First, I can be sensitive to the fact that there are some people who cannot help but be skeptical about things they have no former experience with. Second, I am more sensitive to their insensitivity. I need to realize that it is not his intention to treat me as if I am a liar, although it feels that way to me. This is more mental “work” for me on top of the corrections to my speech as I communicate using this foreign voice.

So the take-away from this little life experience is this: although I thought he was thinking less of my integrity, he really simply couldn’t believe the fascinating medical manifestations. It was not that he wasn’t believing me. I took it too personally. It was simply “unbelievable”!

I thank God that he has given me the wisdom to keep such upsets inside myself so that I didn’t get snippy or impolite. Also, the humor mode that allowed me to take an uncomfortable topic and make light of it at my own expense allows me to lighten up. That gets me through the moment. Then, later,  I can really analyze what transpired so I can prepare for the next time such a thing happens.

Live and learn.

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First, honestly assess where I am. I am in poor health and am driving myself unrealistically to do more things which only increases stress and puts importance on achievement of activities to determine my success. WRONG! This Christmas, God gave me the gift of honestly facing the fact that I have serious physical limitations that may never go away. Rather than being mournful over the time that I’ve lost, I want to celebrate what I can do.

So, secondly, I used the current Women in the Word Bible study materials that we are using called “Seeking Him” to launch me into personal inspection for the purpose of spiritual revival. I have been searching for how I have been falling short of God’s best for me. As a result, I went to my husband and a pastoral mentor and we did a great deal of growing.

Thirdly, this friend suggested that we follow the Bible’s instruction “Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord.” –James 5:14.  On December 27th, 2009 Steve, Michelle and I went into Pastor’s office and were surrounded by the deacons of the church and I received encouragement and much prayer. Many of them had not been aware that the Chronic Fatigue has been a battle for fifteen years, the chronic pain since Sept. 1987 and now the mysteries of the Foreign Accent Syndrome posed it’s own challenges. These men blessed our family greatly at that event.

Through a series of events and with the help of FaceBook on the internet, I met a Christian lady who did network marketing of a supplement product that we believed might help me. I was given a two week sample and I tried it. It is called MaxGXL. It is a glucothione accelerator which works at the mitochonrial cellular level and has had wonderful effects! There was a period of some detox side effects like headache, but my energy increased so that I was actually able to do more.

I am experiencing more stamina now, and so have been able to actually reorganize my pantry. It may sound like a little thing to most people, but it is something I count as a blessing.

Next, I came to the understanding that I do have great mental challenges when it comes to categorization. However, I simply don’t know what to do about it. It greatly effects my inability to file papers and organize things. I do well with my artwork materials because I have those relationships ingrained, but many other things have me stumped.  I have noticed the problem over the last two tax seasons, but it has gotten increasingly worse. I have told Steve of the problem, however, whether he doesn’t understand that I have a problem or simply doesn’t know what to do about it, in either case I am still in need of help.

Therefore, I did the next hardest thing to admitting I have a problem. I asked for help!  Now, when it comes to finding that person to help me, I am not asking someone to just come in and work at cleaning my place up. No! I am more than willing to do the work, although I wouldn’t turn down the help :0) because there is so much backlog. What I really need is someone to come in and teach me methodology. I need to be taught a process which before now just came naturally. What do I do with this? It is very humbling, but I am desperately in need of that help.

I have set, what I believe to be a realistic goal for myself, to have things in order around the house before the end of March. It really needs to be straightened out yesterday, but I am trying to be sensitive to what is a reasonable goal so that I can break it down to doable tasks.

I would appreciate your prayers in this, as that certain person or persons to come meet this need that I have so earnestly prayed for has not yet arrived. And as I attempt to do it on my own, I seem to make more messes, before I make any small progress.

All in all, January has been a time to “turn the page” as I start a new chapter. I have been attempting to accurately assess where I am, address what I can reasonably change, ask for help, and make definite progress as I seek God’s best for me. Prayer and studying God’s Word have been foundational in keeping me moving forward through the trials. It is so hard, but so worthwhile when I realize that as I put forth my best God will honor my efforts by transforming me to be better than I was before.

Here’s to new beginnings . . . and the God of all grace who makes it possible!

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Also, in December I had been increasingly afflicted with the extremely low energy associated with Chronic Fatigue Immune Deficiency Syndrome. As the daylight hours reduce at this time of year, the ability of my body to function decreases as well. Even the simplest of tasks takes exponentially more energy to accomplish. So I ended the year refraining from blogging.

As I increasingly pared back on what activities I attempted, I found myself discovering what I valued most. My husband and I grew closer together in our prayer and Bible study times together, as well as those that we shared with our daughter. We communicated more with one another what we really value and the dreams that we have. As a family, we didn’t worry that we didn’t have a lot of money for gifts at Christmas, but dreamed of ways to do the most with what we had.

I became a baking fool. I literally spent 2 weeks in the kitchen baking various candies and a few other baked delights to hand out to some friends. Steve’s work alone had 18 little packages of goodies which yielded smiles and happiness at his workplace. I guess one of his coworkers in particular found that she is somewhat addicted to my Buckeyes (chocolate covered peanut butter nougat balls). I did somewhat perfect the peanut brittle this year too.

We mailed off Christmas packages to relatives via Priority mail to arrive before Christmas only to find that 2 of the 3 were addressed wrong and returned the second week of January!! Argh!  However, we did spend a lovely Christmas Eve at Steve’s folks and had a wonderful lamb feast with family before returning home between bad ice storms.

As New Year’s Eve arrived, I was ready to put 2009 behind me and start a new decade.

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Next, let me say, that the video below is NOT staged. In fact it is extremely impromptu as evidenced by our lack of fine attire and makeup. Nonetheless, I think it is important to show this video to people in order to bring to light an extremely rare medical condition.

Fran found me via a local radio station who had interviewed me from time to time. “Fisher Fran” as we affectionately refer to her has  episodes of a few days with it. Her case, waxes and wanes with a good deal of normalness in between. She has other body weaknesses that resemble multiple sclerosis whereas I do not.

My foreign accent has continued for over six months now without relenting. Although, I have noticed improvement in some words as I apply tricks that I have developed through speech therapy. Another difference in our two cases is that I am able to sing in my “normal” voice, whereas, Fran cannot sing at all when she becomes accented (even though, she to sings for audiences).

Here is a video taken of me (Eastside Ellen) and Fisher Fran back in June 2009. At that point I had been speaking with foreign accented speech for a month and Fran was in day two of an exasperation of her symptoms.

This video was captured by Fran’s daughter and so is not exactly framed as well as a more experienced photographer would have done. PLUS… she and I were both in our grubbier clothes as we rushed to meet with one another without the benefit of clothing changes or make-up. We were just so happy to discover that we were not the only one with this problem that we couldn’t wait another moment. As you see in this video we are quite happy to have found one another and are enjoying our ability to joke about our situation in a unique way.

However, let me stress this. Foreign Accent Syndrome is NOT a joking matter. Rather it is an extremely rare medical malady involving the Broches’(speech) area of the brain. It is reported that only 39 medically documented cases have been reported…ever…in the whole world.  Because it is so rare, there are not many doctors who even know about it. Therein lies the problem. If they are unsure what causes it, how to fix it and it is so rare. There is not much help for a person who has it.

In fact that is the main purpose of me documenting as much as I can about it. Researchers could learn a lot about this if they applied themselves. Because it is such a rare occurrence the argument may be made that there is not much point in researching it from a cost benefit analysis standpoint. However, since it involves the study of the brain and speech/accent production, I think that this is a pioneering area that some university or speech pathology school would want to investigate more.

As one who has now endured it for six months, I am learning that I am teaching my speech pathologist at the same time she is teaching me. This is unchartered territory here. So it is going to take the willingness of all involved to recognize that we do not have all the answers. In fact, we must admit that we have far more questions than answers. Yet, since I am the one living with Foreign Accent Syndrome,  I am a self-made researcher trying to document for the benefit of medical knowledge and hopefully to bring a sense of understanding to both the sufferers and their loved ones.

I am going to try to get another video with Fran and me together within the next few days. This time I WILL at least look better for the camera : P

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Here is a video that someone sent me a link to. This was the inspiration for finally writing this blog. Something that I had been meaning to write for some time. LOL

WHY do I procrastinate.  Why wait to do what I know NEEDS to be done?  I believe there are a few things worth considering here. Perhaps the greatest deterrent to getting something done is FEAR. Fear of failure, or that I will mess things up. Maybe my bent toward perfectionism is screaming at me to “Wait! You SHOULD do it this way. This other way may be better.” It’s the dreaded “Shoulda, woulda, coulda”s of an overly creative mind that can bog me down. And, just maybe, it is that FEAR that overrides our desire to just get on with the task at hand.

Don’t get me wrong. I do believe that one shouldn’t just barge forth without any direction or preparedness. But I see that there is this (sometimes hard to define) borderline between appropriately pausing and taking careful steps to proceed versus stopped and not willing or apparently unable to proceed. A procrastination paralysis produces a productivity nightmare!

The solution? Ha! If I knew that I could be a millionaire as a result of all the motivational speaking engagements that I could do at the conventions full of the myriads of people who are searching for a way out. I would right a book and go on book signing tours.  Well, maybe someday.

Seriously, as I think about it now, I believe one of the biggest solutions to my bouts of procrastination is to face the fact that I am doing it. Call it what it really is. Procrastination in my case is a sin.

Does that seem harsh to you? Well, remember, this is in dealing with my own procrastination. I am going to treat it as a sin because sin is defined as being “off the mark”.  I believe that God does call me to be holy as He is holy; to strive to live a righteous and productive life. I also believe that the ONLY way for me to do that is by utilizing the grace of God given to me as a free gift when I became His child. At the moment of my salvation, I was saved. That is past tense. It’s a done deal.

Now, as I “seek first the Kingdom of God,” I am challenged to grow up into a better way of doing things. I daily “walk by faith” when I study the Bible and use God’s Word to transform my old ways of thinking and doing things into a better way. So, you see, if I am applying what I am learning,  I am always growing. There is no room for procrastination there.

As I face this personal sin of procrastination I need to remember to say “STOP! This is wrong.”  I must admit that I am choosing to allow my fear of the unknown future to allow me to enter into an old, prideful way of thinking that based my success on what I did and how well I performed.

So, for me, stopping procrastination is getting back on track. Stop what I am doing wrong, learn the correction, and do that. I actively choose to say, “Lord help me: remind me to place your love before my fears.”  I need to remember that perfect love casts out fear and practice that.  It does take practice.  That perfect love is available to me (and to you too) in the redeeming work of Jesus Christ who provides a way . . . the ONLY way out of the fear and into the love.

1 John 4:18 (NASB)
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.

At this moment, I can say I am not procrastinating. How about you?

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