I want 2012 to be a milestone of change and it starts now… here… with me “getting my house in order.” So, I am intentionally honing at the first of 2012 in a way that I trust will lead to some serious cutting away of the unnecessary in favor of a sharper, more impactful use of my future. I want to disentangle myself of the “clutter”; simplify and streamline so that I will be more available for what the Lord would direct me to do with my life. Once I get through the tediousness of reorganization I believe I will not only be freed from the space-hogging “stuff” of things and superfluous obligations, but will also free up time which I KNOW can be better spent.

How am I doing it? First, I have gone to greater lengths to seek God’s will. I am still dedicating daily time to reading God’s Word. I have been blessed by the “read through the Bible in a year” discipline for the last three years. Every single time I come to portions where I say “I don’t remember ever having read THAT before”.  I can testify that the Word of God is “living” just as  the Scripture itself testifies. It has great power for change. So I am starting year four of reading through it cover to cover on top of my other in-depth studies. After all I cannot “hide God’s Word in my heart” if I don’t read or hear it.

I further sharpen the axe, so to speak, by prayer. This one has become ever more important to me. Almost exactly a year ago, a very dear elderly woman in our church passed away. At her funeral service I was profoundly struck by the number of people that spoke of her as a prayer warrior. It was especially gripping when children and grandchildren testified to finding list upon list in her handwriting of specific prayer requests, with dates of prayer concerns and dates answered or additional updates. This prayer warrior had gone before God’s throne with concerns and praises of hundreds of people. . . she had interceded in a very actionable way… naming them specifically (whether dear family member or stranger) . The hundreds of names that this woman left behind and her children found shook my prayer life to its core. “WHY? Why Ellen, don’t YOU pray more? What impact are YOU having through prayer?”

When it comes to praying for others, my method of praying over the years has been more of a series of darts thrown heavenward. I guess because I am visual, I rely heavily on cues to remind me to pray for a certain person. My kitchen faucet is assigned to those who I continue to pray for salvation. My refrigerator door handle reminds me to pray for provision. My bathroom ( medicine cabinets) remind me to pray for those suffering physical needs. Newstime on TV… lots of prayer cues there, but also reminds me to pray for our government and public servants. When I see an emergency vehicle, traffic accident, obvious suffering, I immediately shoot off another prayer dart. I don’t mean to belittle this method of praying, but one thing it does NOT do, is it doesn’t keep an account like a prayer journal would do.

So – - – I resolved in 2012 to start a prayer journal. But that left me with the big question of HOW exactly do I DO that?!  I mean, when I was a teenage girl I started a diary (complete with lock and key to keep out nosey siblings) just as many of my friends did. However, inevitably I’d vow to write in my diary every day, and by early February I’d miss a day or two. My life just wasn’t that noteworthy. I’d feel guilty for missing my entries, then sharpen my resolve and maybe get an addition week or two of entries in a stretch. Next thing you know, I’d not have another entry for months and that one would be some special event had happened like a family 4th of July gathering or something!

Well, I’ve decided to walk as a Christian . . . by FAITH.  That faith is not in myself. No way! I am going to trust in God to give me both the direction AND the strength to achieve what HE wants me to accomplish. I know that I might fail. uh..strike the word “might”. . . I  will fail. Maybe repeatedly. However, this is NOT all about me. It’s about Jesus Christ. It’s about my wanting to be more like Him; to truly intercede for people on behalf of what has not only current ramifications for the person(s) I am praying for, but everlasting consequences. I truly ache for those who struggle through life without a Savior. I feel that ache as I visualize Jesus outside of Lazarus’ tomb and the gates of Jerusalem crying. So prayer is too important of a privilege for me to take lightly. Not that I was in any way insincere in my “prayer without ceasing” method of praying “darts” throughout my day, but I need to add something more.

I believe I need to start journaling prayer. It is not going to be easy for me, but I think of the ebenezers that were set as memorial stones of remembrance throughout the Old Testament. These were lasting testimonies to what God had done! So I have consulted a few friends to ask for ANY suggestions on HOW they prayer journal. Any advise at all is welcome. I know it is not a one method fits all proposition. I am handicapped in not having a step by step instruction method before me on this one. However, I believe that I must purpose to do this for the benefit of being able to look back on those lists, all the names, all the prayers and answers to prayers, listing the many praiseworthy “only by God’s grace” occurrences that people explain as miracles, etc.  I think that perhaps this will be a wonderful tool to remind me of God’s active involvement in our lives.

In regard to prayer. . . the very beginning of 2012 has brought to me a new spiritual discipline as our church has encouraged people to engage in prayer in fasting during the first 40 days of 2012. Not that I have never, ever fasted before. But this time I planned ahead; I took time to prepare for the time of fasting and prayer. All the other times were more like emotionally entering a short time of fasting contemporaneously. This time; like my determination of being more intentional in all the areas of my life, I am taking the time to grab up the axe of action and not just start chopping, but to take the time to grind that axe to a very sharp edge by using the Lord’s honing stone to sharpen me “before” I can be used more effectively.  ”Grind on Master . . . I know there is some shiny metal under all of this rust and if anyone can get to it, You can!” In the meantime I would much appreciate your prayers as I press myself against the grinding stone that will reshape my future. Likewise, if you have ANY comments about how you handle this area of spiritual development I would be very grateful if you shared them with me.

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What I really like about this story, is that they allow her to tell the profound way in which it suddenly turned her life around and didn’t either sensationalize it, nor make her out to be something peculiar. Rather the reporter stressed that the occurrences are rare, but kept the story one of a positive and interesting note. It pulls the audience in to learn more.

I absolutely am thrilled with how Ronda is teaching English to students though she has a foreign accented voice. She is not daunted, but is using her new voice as she points out in a way which actually helps her to interact more with her students than she would have otherwise.

That’s making lemonade out of lemons! Now, if more people will come forward to investigate why this happens and actively seek to connect and study the phenomena, maybe we will see that it is not as rare as it thought. Maybe the medical research will endeavor to actively study those of us who wish to offer ourselves and our experiences for the sake of scientific improvement in this area. At the very least, this is getting legitimized by reputable reports such as this, so that less ignorant and vile statements will be made to those who suffer from a malady which can as of yet not really be easily explained.

We are fearfully and wonderfully made. Keep on being kind to one another : )

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Therefore, I am very happy to add to my blog these links to these news stories which were done by JAX TV station in Florida. It is exciting to see some media attention being given to the disorder. Let some people who believe that this is not a “real” problem become less ignorant by getting a little exposure and also help those who are currently dealing with similar stories to take heart.

Here are recent videoes done with fellow Foreign Accent Syndrome friends of mine done by local Florida news TV stations.

This first one is a longer raw interview with Dr. Jack Ryalls from University of Central Florida. He is well known for his expertise in this field of study of the very rare disorder. So it is especially good to hear his insights in this more lengthy piece on what is involved in Foreign Accent Syndrome from his perspective.
Interview with Dr. Jack Ryalls Fox30

Pattie Yakaboski,
Pattie: Finding Her Voice

Video of Paula Westberry
Paula on JAX 2011.11

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Should this happen in an area that is not frequented by road-kill restraunteers (like Kentucky or Arkansas) or buzzards, a few more car tire passes placed across the remains and a couple of days of drying and stiffening; then; wallah… you have yourself a frisbee squirrel.

Now that you have the proper definition, you can better appreciate why I chose to use the “frisbee squirrel” as an accurate descriptor for my body on some days. On really, excessively weak days I even say “transparent” frisbee squirrel day implying run over even more!

If this were a Bugs Bunny cartoon, maybe someone could just pick me up, shake me a little from side to side, and then blow me back up (like a balloon) into shape!

As it is, I have discovered that severe Chronic Fatigue makes my Foreign Accent Syndrome much worse (so no talking), I am too weak to do anything (so bedrest) and confusion makes reading and writing difficult. That is why you may not hear or see me much, but will see … It’s a Frisbee squirrel day @@=~

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"Am I overlooking something?"

Just a super quick note to thank you for your patience while my host server issues for my wordpress blog were fixed. I know it’s been down a while and I am WAY over due for a LOT of posts. However, I am on my way to a big meeting. So will come back and write more later.

In the meantime, this is to let you know “WE FOUND IT”….the problem’s been addressed and we are ready to FLY.

Should you be computer challenged I know of a superb Geek to recommend… @Codatory.  Thanks Alex!

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Looking at the Cross

As I look up at the cross I see,
The Guiltless Lamb who died for me.
I see the thorns that adds to the pain,
In the form of a crown, His born for my gain.

It’s hard to look upon those stripes
so bloody & wide, deep & thin,
Not that they were undeserved,
but just payment for MY sin.

So how is it that Jesus is up there,
while I remain unscathed?
Because of what He Himself has said…
“There is NO OTHER WAY”!

The sky grew dark, the thunder rolled,
the very earth shook;  rock and stone,
The penalty paid;  “It is Finished” crossed His lips,
and the furious wrath of God was shown.

Indeed the innermost veil of the temple
was torn by God above,
Not only was God’s wrath poured out
but Grace,  such undeserving Love.

For by the supplying His very own Son
Jesus came as both sacrifice and priest,
that we might be reconciled to God,
and partake in the Passover Feast.

Don’t you see what’s been done here?
What a great price has been paid!
When the sins of the world,
were upon Jesus Christ laid.

And He willingly bore them,
ought of His perfecting love,
that we might be with Him
forever, in eternity above.

====================

Please join me Dear Friend in honoring what took place on this Good Friday!
He who was without sin became sin for us so that we might become the righteousness of God through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Blessing and Honor and Glory to the Lamb who was slain, forever and ever- Amen.

©2011E5e attribution rights reserved

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Dear Praying Family,

Thank you for your continued prayer, love,support and encouagement.
Jonah has contracted a Sepsis infection in his blood. He has had many transfusions.
The source of the infection has not been determined.
He has been very close to death 2 times this week.
The Lord is also very close to him, and us as well.
We are trusting in Christ, who loves us all so very much.

Jonah is being treated with anti biotics.
Just seeking more prayer, hoping your Church may receive this in time to pray as a Church.
So glad to have you as our supporters.
So glad to have the Mission, BMM, so strongly behind us, there for us.

Looking forward to a good time of worshiping our Lord, and ministering to our Church family.

Thanks again, so very much. It’s been a long hard journey. Jonah has been thru so very much,
it really hurts to see him have to struggle so. He can be in no better place, as in the will of Jesus.
Nor can any of us.

We love you dearly,
In Christ’s Love,
Marty for Val

I am posting this from my church in hopes that you will have time to pray in yours.

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As of April 5th…2011

Dear Praying Family,

We are ever so greatful to you all for your prayers for us and our baby.

We went thru some dark days, as it looked again that we would lose Jonah,

but God has answered our prayers once again.

Jonah is still running a fever, but is mildly improving.

There is talk of possibly releasing him to a rehab hospital in Westchester,

in possibly as little as a month, or as long as 6 months.

We look forward to this, yet the challenge of having Jonah an hour away, instead of a few minutes

is one we have no idea how to work out logistically with considerations of the entire families needs.

We are still completely on our own in regards to staying w/ Jonah at the hospital and caring for our

other 3 children.

This has been a most difficult and challenging time in our lives.

The Lord has supplied us w/ strength, although at times it seems we are not able to rise to the callenges,

but God is with us.

Thank you so much for your continued prayers for Jonah’s recovery and for our family.

Jonah is 14 weeks old today. He is still in ICU.

In Christ’s love,

Marty for Val Silverberg

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God has shown us great miracles in the fact that little Jonah has lived through all that he has. This tiny child has literally been brought back from death’s doorway via heart attacks and breathing problems… he’s endured high fevers, poor breathing, digestion, and brain wave activity… it’s truly amazing!

If you are new to Baby Jonah’s plight, please just search “Baby Jonah” even in this site’s search box and you can read how very much this family has endured. God is faithful all the way along, and we may not understand what is being accomplished by all of this. However, of this one thing we can be sure: God is, always has been, and will always be…IN CONTROL!

NOW:

Dear Praying Family,

Jonah’s condition has taken another turn for the worse.

His Sepsis infection has returned, he is running a fever,

his central line is infected, and he is generally doing very poorly.

3 attempts were made to put in a new line, all failed.

The cardiac team does not want a line put in his upper body,

as they still hold out hope for the next round of surgeries to

save Jonah’s life. Upper body lines would eliminate the chance for

such future surgeries. The team meets today to discuss what to do.

Jonah is still unable to digest nutrients, and is on the ventilator attached to his

trach tube.

We are very worn out as well.

Thank you for your continued faithful prayers.

Jonah will be 13 weeks old tomorrow.

In Christ’s Love,

Marty for Val

on the 24th after his Trach tube surgery

“Dear Praying Family,
Trach surgery went well. Jonah continues to recover from it. Please continue in prayer for him and the rest of our family. We are hoping and praying for him to recover from this surgery, and his sepsis infection. Then we hope to find out why he is not digesting any nutrients. It has been suggested that his G-tube, for feeding is leaking.
Thank you so very much.”
In Christ’s Love,
Marty for Val

All of this has been such a long trial. Please join me in praying for God’s best to be evident. That the most awesome glory go to God while the wonders He has wrought through this little one’s life testify to His love for every detail of every heart beat, breath and movement. Of course, I am asking for Jonah’s physical comfort and healing, but also his emotional peace. I cannot imagine! Does he get to be cuddled at all with all the tubes? I pray so. I know that Val has made every effort to be at his side as much as possible and is surely having physical contact with him.

I am asking specifically for prayer for Jonah’s mother and father, Val and Marty Silverberg. How very hard it must be to see there little one in distress. I am also asking that as you look at your own family gathered around the dinner table, or as you read them a bedtime story and tuck them into bed; or as you simply hold them in your lap close to your chest — will you not send a great prayer of thanksgiving for the precious gift that you have been given in that child(ren)?

Now, will you also lift up a heart-felt prayer for Jonah’s older brothers and sister? These children haven’t gotten to even play with their little brother, but in their limited child-like understanding, have to come to terms with “we don’t know”. His older sister Shakinah is especially sensitive to the precarious uncertainties of her little brother’s future.

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Baby Jonah will be facing yet another surgery Tuesday the 22nd. After being born with a major heart deformaty only about four months ago, this tiny boy has not even been able to go home to his missionary parents home with his older brother and sisters. Marty and Val Silverberg have had to face numerous surgeries, near death episodes, nutritional concerns, brain functioning scares, recently a sepsis infection due to numerous blood transfusions and now … tomorrow, Tuesday, March 22nd, little Jonah faces a life threatening surgery as they place a trachiotomy tube which may prove too great a strain on his weak heart.

Dear Praying Family,
 
Jonah is still not receiving food.
He is on IV drip.
 
Val has decided to go ahead w/ Tracheotomy surgery.
She wants to be able to take him home.
He cannot breathe on his own. Drs. say it is a mystery why.
He is not able to digest nutrients either.
Trach surgery comes w/ risk of fatal heart attack.
Hoping for surgery this week.
Little Jonah has been thru so much.
Please continue to Pray w/ us for a miraculous recovery.
Also, we all need strength to go on.
 
We have received much encouragement from some of you, esp those, going thru or having gone thru similiar. Thank you for sharing w/ us your pain and encouraging us.
 
In spite of reports stating different, we are still w/o any help either at home or at the hospital.
We are grateful for a woman and her daughter who want to come and help from 2 hours away, and are prayerfully working thru the best way to receive their help, which may be available Mondays and Saturday afternoon.
 
Thank you so very much for your continued prayer support during this long and difficult time.
Jonah will be 12 weeks old on Tuesday.
 
In Christ’s Love,
Marty for Val

AND THEN

Dear Praying Family,
 
We received a call tonight that Jonah will have the Trach put in tomorrow, which is Tuesday, 3/22/11.
 
Val is a bit out of sorts as the heart specialist is weary of this trach surgery at this time, and Jonah’s ability to live thru this. Val feels it needs to be done, and I support her decision.
 
Also found ouit from Josh’s bus driver that tomorrow, Tuesday is a half day for Josh, further pushing things out of sorts. We had many other things on the sched for tomorrow also, we’ll see what the Lord allows.
 
Thank you again for your prayers.
 
In Christ’s Love,
Marty for Val

I hope you will keep this tiny soul, his family and the surgeons and nurses who care for him in you prayers.

Dear Val & Marty,
I am especially praying for you to have blessed assurance and that your darling little one will be cradled in the loving arms of God as he faces this next big event. I do believe God is sparing the child much of the pain we loved ones fear he is going through. We have such a loving and merciful Father.
Alongside you in the Spirit, Ellen

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